Regular

Tony: At my funeral, there’s going to be a closed casket, and then it’ll be open to reveal that I’m not inside. Instead, they’ll turn on the ceiling fan and my lifeless body will swing around the room while the Space Jam theme song is playing.

[later]

Tony: Never mind. Pepper says I can’t do that.

evanzski: ( ◕ ω ◕ )

evanzski:

( ◕ ω ◕ )

Regular

Tony: Shut up, Quill.

Quill: …Okay.

Stephen: Shut up, Quill.

Tony: Hey no one tells him to shut up but me!

Regular

Tony: I can’t wait for the day I finally just, stop.

[later]

Tony: I have been informed that this is called “death”.

Regular

hawkbucks:

hawkbucks:

Bucky: You must be one of Hades’ kids, right?

Tony: I am? Bucky, you already know this–

Bucky: Because you’re drop dead gorgeous, sweetheart.

Bucky: The fires of the Underworld wish they burned as bright as your eyes.

Steve, muttering: This is so painful.

One of my favourites AUs 💙

Regular

Scott: [asks a question]

Tony: Lang, I have never heard so much stupidity come out of someone’s mouth. My last two brain cells are struggling to stay alive in an attempt to make sense of the nonsense that you willingly spoke. Stop.

Regular

Tony: Did it hurt?

Loki: Did what hurt?

Tony: When you broke through the earth’s crust, ascending from hell.

valvkyrie:

valvkyrie:

– Charlotte Geier

raptorwhisperer: You wanna do this whole lone …

raptorwhisperer:

You wanna do this whole lone gunslinger act, and it’s unnecessary. You don’t have to do this alone.

sbstianstan:

sbstianstan:

We’re now in a flying donut, billions of miles from Earth with no back-up.