Category: steve x tony

Steve: People like you, are the reason I swear.

Tony: …Understandable.

Steve: Wait, you are involved in this!?!

Tony: You’ve known me for far too long to be as surprised by this news as you are.

Steve: …Why are you smiling like that?

Tony: Because it’s pissing them off.

Steve: I apologize for being late. I was busy doing stuff.

Fury: I see... [to Tony] What’s your excuse?

Tony: I’m stuff.

Tony: May I sit there?

Steve: That’s my lap.

Tony: That doesn’t answer my question, Steven.

Steve: Truth or dare?

Tony: Truth.

Steve: Why don’t you love yourself?

Tony: Dare.

Steve: I dare you to love yourself.

Tony: I don’t like this game.

Steve: Play that funky music, white boy!

Tony: I’m surprised you know that reference.

Steve: What reference?

Steve: [sighing exasperated] What am I going to do with you?

Tony: Ideally? Fuck me at some point. 

Tony: I can take you to the movies, if you’re allowed.

Steve: If I’m allowed?

Tony: Yeah, you’re not usually allowed to take snacks in.

Steve: [not understanding] I’m sure we can buy some snacks when we get there.

Tony: [facepalms]

Natasha: Hey Tony, nice top.

Tony: Oh this old thing? Thanks.

Steve: I have a name.

Natasha: What?

Tony: What?

Steve: … Uh…