Category: rhfe

Regular

Rhodey: What happened there, Tones? Hit another bridge whilst flying?

Tony: That happened one time, Rhodey.

Regular

Rhodey: I’m sorry to tell you this but you have a heart, and capacity to feel.

Tony: You take that back.

Regular

Tony: This is horrible. This is the most humiliating thing to ever happen to me…

Rhodey: Even more humiliating than-

Tony: Let’s not do this.

Regular

Rhodey: It’s time to do what you do best, Tones.

Tony: Get on people’s nerves?

Rhodey: Exactly!

Regular

Rhodey: Tony! Be careful.

Tony: Well, you know me, Platypus.

Rhodey: Sure do.

Rhodey: So be careful.

Regular

Tony: You actually care about me?

Rhodey: Of course I do, you dumbass bitch.

Regular

Rhodey: [officiating at Tony and Stephen’s wedding] I have watched your childish rivalry turn grow into a childish courtship, and now I am proud to witness that childish courtship blossom into what will undoubtedly be a childish marriage.

Regular

[Tony bursts in, obviously drunk]

Tony: Yo- hooo!

Rhodey: Where the hell’ve you been?

Tony: Ty and I just crashed an embassy party.

Rhodey: Are you drunk?!

Tony: Noooo! [comes closer and whispers] I’m lying. I am so drunk.

Regular

Tony: Have I got things to tell you!

Rhodey: What happened?

Tony: I’m engaged.

Rhodey: Congratulations. Who’s the lucky girl?

Tony: [panicked] I am!

Regular

Tony: Please don’t say “Listen to your heart”.

Rhodey: Tones…

Tony: Or my kidney, or my spleen, or any other vital organs.

Rhodey: What do you want me to tell you, then?