Category: incorrect iron dad

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Tony: You have to learn to love yourself.

Peter: But Mr. Stark, don’t you hate yourself?

Tony: This is about you. Stay focused.

Peter: [sits down and stares at the wall]

Tony: Pete? What’s wrong?

Peter: Mr. Stark, did you know that ‘rap’ stands for ‘rhyme and poetry’?

Tony: [sits down and joins Peter in staring at the wall]

Peter: Anyone who owns a salt lamp and says they never licked it is a liar and can’t be trusted!

Tony: …

Tony: What the fuck, Peter…?

friendly-neighbourhood-ironman:

Original post by @incorrecttonyxeveryonequotes

Tony: What are you doing?

Peter: [spreading toothpaste on toast] I’m multitasking.

broskepol:

really liked the concept of peter sitting on the ceiling when sulking
(and of course tony has to try and make the kid come down somehow)

inspired by this

Omg… 😂

Morgan: [starts screaming at 3AM]

Pepper: [half-asleep] Your turn.

Tony: Ugh, fine…

Tony: [starts screaming]

Peter: Oh fiddle sticks! Oh diddly gee golly gosh goldarnit! That really ruffles my feathers! Really dills my pickle!

Tony: [crying in the corner] Please, just say F U C K…

Peter: [to Thanos] You…you…you rude person!

Thanos: …

Tony: [drily] Go easy on him, Kid.