Category: incorrect frostiron

Regular

Tony: Just be yourself. Say something nice.

Loki: Which one? I can’t do both. 

Regular

Tony: I’m sorry, Steve. He wins. I can’t resist him.

Steve: Tony, you have to.

Loki: Stay out of this! This is our relationship. He’s my man and we have something twisted and beautiful. Oh… you want Tony. That’s what this is all about.

Steve: No, that’s insane…. fine, I had one dream, but no, no.

Regular

Tony: You need my help.

Loki: I wouldn’t phrase it like that.

Tony: Well, if you want my help, you better phrase it exactly like that.

Regular

Loki: We will not fight today.

Tony: How’s Monday?

Loki: Why Monday?

Tony: Simple, everyone hates it.

Loki: Good point.

Regular

Tony: What’s your favorite movie?

Loki: Robocop. It’s got everything I like: gratuitous violence.

Tony: Oh, I thought you were listing things.

Loki: I was. I’m done.

Regular

[spotting Loki]

Rhodey: Check it out… green leather,  black, greasy hair. 11:00. What d’you think?

Tony: [looking at Loki] Yummy!…

Rhodey: That’s what I thought. Case closed. Steve, move in. Tony thinks he’s hot.

Tony: What do you mean?

Rhodey: You always fall for the bad guy.

Regular

Tony: Did it hurt?

Loki: Did what hurt?

Tony: When you broke through the earth’s crust, ascending from hell.

Pepper and Rhodey are in charge of Tony's…

Pepper and Rhodey are in charge of Tony's future suitors. Wanna an in with Tony? You must impress his number one girl and number one guy first.

Rhodey: I just want you to know that I used to think there was no man or woman on this world good enough for Tony…
Suitor: Aw!
Rhodey: …And I still think that.

Regular

Tony: So, lemme get this straight… You only slept with me to get Stark Industries secrets?

Loki: Yes. I’m a spy. It’s literally part of my job. Black Widow did the exact same thing.

Tony: So… So you didn’t even like me?

Loki: I didn’t actively want to stab you twenty four seven, if that’s what you mean.

Tony: I feel so used!!

Regular

seraphic-seeker:

Loki: Is there something you want to tell me?

Tony: I accidentally read a spell book…

Loki: And what did you learn?

Tony: That Norse language is fucking hard.

Welp…