Category: black widow

Regular

Tony: Hey, guys, check it out. Pepper sent me the paper.

Natasha: Let’s see it.

Clint: Oh, yeah, that looks good.

Natasha: You make a very attractive couple.

Tony: Yeah, we look great together.

Bucky: We really do.

Steve: Okay.

Tony: Imagine what our kids would look like.

Bucky: We don’t have to imagine.

Steve: I’m marrying him.

Bucky: We’ll see.

Regular

Tony: Ah, I’m really starting to feel this in my shoulders. You couldn’t give my a back rub, could you?

Natasha: That’s right; I couldn’t.

Regular

[Natasha is stabbing the air between Steve and Tony]

Steve: What are you doing?

Natasha: Trying to cut the sexual tension between you two. Unfortunately, it isn’t working.

Regular

Tony: How was I?

Natasha: Scattered. Annoying. Alternating between genius and bad puns.

Tony:

Business as usual, then.

Regular

Tony: Okay. Now I’m scared.

Natasha: It’s okay, I’m here.

Bucky: Nat, you’re what’s scaring us.

Regular

Clint: I can’t tell whom you’re teasing. Is it Steve or Tony?

Natasha: Yes.

Regular

Natasha: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity? 

Tony: Hey, Clint, how tall are you?

Regular

Natasha: But you had sex right?

Tony: Well of course we had sex.

Natasha: Bruce and I didn’t. He fell asleep and I watched gay porn.

Tony: See, that’s what happens when you say ‘I love you!’

Regular

Tony: And there’s no repercussion for this?

Natasha: I will not punch you.

Tony: Oddly specific.

Regular

Natasha: I hope you have a good explanation for this.

Tony: We have three.

Bucky: Pick your favourite.