Officiant: Repeat after me, “I, Anthony, take Virginia Potts to be my wife.”
Tony: I, Tony, take Bucky Barnes-
Bucky: Get me a fucking dress!
Natasha: So? How’s Clint?
Tony: Bad news.
Tony: [steps to the side to reveal Clint] He’s still alive.
[Steve and Tony walking in the park]
Some guy: [about Tony, whistles] Damn, nice ass!
Steve: Tony, say something!
Tony: [turns around] Thank you! I’ve been doing squats.
Bucky: You can say, “Have a nice day!” without a problem.
Bucky: But you can’t say “Enjoy the next 24 hours” without sounding vaguely threatening.
Tony: How did you get into my workshop?
Bucky: Hey guys, Tony and I just got back from a fun run.
Tony: Fun run? Hydra’s agents chased us for 16 blocks!
Bucky: Great cardio.
Steve: [kills a spider]
Tony: God, I wish that was me.
Steve: Tony, go and put a dollar in that self hatred jar now please.
Tony: Good thing I’m rich.
[after a debrief]
Steve: Hey, Tony. Really good job back there. It took guts.
Tony: Thanks, Steve.
[long moment of silence]
Steve: I would like to ask you…what i really want to ask you…
Natasha: For God’s sake! He wants you to go out with him!
Logan: Hey bub…
Tony: You just had your tongue down my throat less than five minutes ago, don’t you dare call me “bub”.
Clint: Change is inedible.
Tony: Don’t you mean inevitable?
Clint: [spits out a bunch of pennies] I did not.
Tony: [looking at sky] This view is so beautiful, right guys?
Steve: [looking at Tony’s ass] Wonderful!
Clint: [looking at Tony’s ass] Totally!
Bucky: [looking at Tony’s ass] Yep.