Category: anthony stark

Regular

Tony: Didn’t you get my text?

Steve: What? You mean the string of nonsensical emojis?

Regular

Rhodey: What happened there, Tones? Hit another bridge whilst flying?

Tony: That happened one time, Rhodey.

Regular

Bucky: I don’t know whether to laugh or shoot you.

Tony: Surprise me.

Regular

Tony: You know, you can solve your problems without threats.

Loki: Okay, but consider, I’m really, really good at threats.

Regular

Tony: [standing outside of Steve’s window holding a sign that says “GALA?”]

Bucky: [leaning out the window] Oh my God! Yes!

Tony: No! Tell Steve!

Bucky: Stevie, I’m going to the gala with your boyfriend!

Regular

Tony: [looking at Bucky] Omg, did you see his cheekbones? Did you see his fucking cheekbones?!

Regular

Tony: If I had a dollar for every time someone called me ugly…

Tony: I’d be broke, I’m beautiful. Later losers!

Regular

Tony: And now here’s my presentation on why Bucky is the hottest Avenger.

Steve: Tony, this is a meeting to discuss battle plans.

Bucky: No, wait! Let him talk.

Regular

[darkness]

Tony: [he froze after someone grabbed his hand]

Winter: Relax, just me.

Tony: Funnily enough that was my “worst case” scenario.